Tuesday, April 9, 2019

Gratitude is the Antidote to Malcontentedness

Dennis Prager asks the question Are Women Malcontents. He asks this after observing that all of the complaints in Betty Frieden's The Feminine Mysteque have been addressed. Women in America are in general anything but oppressed, and yet the Women's March attracted between 3 and 5 million marchers. This makes it the largest march in American history.

>But a big and troubling thought hit me while reading the book. In the 56 years since "The Feminine Mystique" was published, every complaint Friedan made regarding the situation of the American woman has been addressed. Few American women are forced into "housewifery." The few women who choose to place marriage and home over career have truly chosen to do so; it is the rare young woman for whom marriage and family are greater goals than a successful career. Nor do women any longer go from high school to the wedding chapel. They go from high school to college and often graduate school. In fact, far more women go to college than men.

Yet, if you were to listen to many American women today, you would think nothing has improved. Every women's group and millions of individual women say women are "oppressed" despite the fact that virtually nothing remains of the "feminine mystique" described by Friedan.
Prager goes on to point out that women, particularly college educated middle and upper class women are more than twice as likely as men to be depressed. So, what's going on here? Personally, I think it is a lack of gratitude.  If a person wakes up in the morning, and the first thing he or she does is thank God for the gift of another day, that changes your outlook.  If, when you start to complain, you stop yourself and begin to really count your blessings, you will see that your life isn't really so bad.

Remember, too, that those that seem to have a better life usually had to work very hard for it, and give up much of what you may think is important in your life.  You might have those things if you worked as hard as your neighbor, but what would you have to give up.  Is it truly worth it?

At 66, I am taking guitar lessons from a man who was in the professional music scene for many years.  Now, as a teenager, I was working in my Dad's business, learning that from the ground up, while going to school and preparing for college.  I didn't have a lot of time, or money for guitars and such.  He on the other hand practiced and played guitar for upwards of 4 hours a day.  We each gave up what the other pursued.  That is the nature of getting good enough to compete with the rest of the world.  I don't know about my instructor, but I am content with the choices I made.  And I am grateful to have the time and energy now to pursue other things.

Gratitude is the antidote to malcontentedness.

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